Every Family Should Have A Podcast

James & Jenn Podcasting

My wife and I have been podcasting together since 2007. I won’t get into the details of how to get your wife to podcast because this article is an open call to every couple out there: YOU SHOULD BE PODCASTING!

Obviously podcasting is a fancy word for recording an audio file, turning it into an mp3 and uploading it on the internet. I’ve written several podcast how-to articles on how to start your own show and how I podcast myself. Check them out if you’re looking for some tips.

In our context podcasting becomes an audio timeline of events in your family. Sure we have scrapbooks full of photos… but photos can’t remind you of the weekly events, funny things someone said, little stories that you might forget. Photos can’t capture the voice of your children, the tone of your spouse’s voice. Podcasts can do all of this.

Podcasting, when done correctly, can also serve to bond your family together. Whether you podcast with just a spouse or your entire family, this is a regular event that stands to connect you almost as much as dinner time… but with more lasting effects.

Even if you go through all the work to record, upload, set up the feed and all of the things necessary to do a show… and no one listens… who cares! This is something your family will cherish for years.

Ready to give it a shot? Here are some places to start:

If you end up getting a custom URl (like nlcast.com) consider using GoDaddy.com and the code podname121 to save a few bucks!

Coming Soon: “Ask Jenn”, the Blog Edition

jennandblackberry

After many months of nagging on my part, Jennifer, co-host of the popular marriage advice podcast, Geek Loves Nerd, has decided to start blogging. Her contribution?

We’ve always had an “Ask Jenn” segment on the podcast. The only downside to it is that listeners had to wait a week or maybe more to get the answer to their question. Starting Monday, Jenn’s going to be responding  to these questions right here on the website.

Jennifer will answer questions about parenting, marriage, hobbies, or whatever you can throw at her.

Email such things to geeklovesnerd@gmail.com

This Week’s Popular Posts

Popular Posts

In case you missed anything. Here are this week’s post in order of popularity:

The Foolish Farmer (To Get Love, Give Love)
There was once a Farmer. A foolish man indeed.
He was angry at his crops for staying in their seeds.
He needed food so badly; himself, his wife, and daughter.
The plants refused to grow so he refused them any water.
– James Kennison

Selflessness: The Key TO Fulfillment in Marriage
Most folks will tell you that in a marriage each person has got to give, 50/50. Though it does take two to make it work… true love actually means each person is giving 100% of themselves to the other, independent of what they may or may not receive in return. It is only through selflessness that both are truly fulfilled.

A Selfless Marriage Trains Your Children
One of the greatest benefits of selflessness in a marriage is the example it gives to others. When those others are living in the house with you, share your last name, and look like the both of you (aka your children) the impression is far greater than we can imagine.

Sacrificial Love
I’m learning more and more that getting along with a spouse is less about compromise and more about sacrifice. Compromise means neither person really gets what they want or need from the situation. The goal is to keep the peace and make the issue go away. Sacrifice means someone is giving up what is good for them for the good of the other. Ouch.

Podcast: Show 50 – Our 13th Anniversary
Join Jenn and James on their 13th Anniversary Date… plus a special guest.

Follow us on Twitter: @nlcast & @jkennison

A Selfless Marriage Trains Your Children

They're Watching Us... Learning

One of the greatest benefits of selflessness in a marriage is the example it gives to others. When those others are living in the house with you, share your last name, and look like the both of you (aka your children) the impression is far greater than we can imagine.

Here’s a fact. Children will grow up, and if they marry, they will choose someone exactly like their father (boys) or mother (girls). I have seen this trend almost without exception. Even in the case where the father was absent. I blame traits passed on from mother to daughter in that case. If mom picked badly, daughter will learn that from mom.

If we want our kids to have a great marriage, we’ve got to model it for them. Dads… want your daughter to choose a great guy? Be a great man! What your son to learn how to treat his wife? Model that behavior by treating his mother with respect (and demanding he do the same).

Seems like a lot of work. Not really. If we can focus on being selfless, sacrificial spouses, as the Bible says, “All these things will be added unto you.” Being a great natural example is a side-effect of a great marriage.

Men, when we love our wives properly, we’re teaching our sons how to do it and our daughters what to demand. Wives, when you love your husband properly you’re teaching your sons that inner goodness is rewarded, not an outward image and your daughters that a lasting love is the only thing worth giving herself to.

Comments? Feedback? Is anyone even reading this crizzle? Leave a comment for the love!

Sacrificial Love

ARE183Offering-Posters

I’m learning more and more that getting along with a spouse is less about compromise and more about sacrifice. Compromise means neither person really gets what they want or need from the situation. The goal is to keep the peace and make the issue go away. Sacrifice means someone is giving up what is good for them for the good of the other. Ouch.

Compromise happens when both are to selfish to give the other what they want. The result is no one is happy. No one has their needs met completely and the marriage begins a downward spiral where both spouses are passively positioning themselves to recover lost emotional resources.

Sacrifice means that someone in the relationship has got to be the most willing to stuffer for the other’s good. I’m not talking about a spineless person who always gives in and hates it the entire time. Sacrifice is willingly and lovingly giving up your rights… and that changes everything.

In the Bible the concept of sacrifice is perfectly summarized, “I will not sacrifice to the Lord that which costs me nothing”. Sacrifice isn’t sacrificial unless it costs. When it’s done right, it’s one of the ultimate displays of love.

Not all sacrifices are huge. The little ones are often the most hard to do anyway. Going to Panera with the wife instead of dragging her to Red Robin. Taking the kids on the weekend mornings so she can sleep in. Doing more than your share of housework.

Another concept I’d like to expose you to, “You can’t out-give God”. The idea is that you can never go wrong giving time, finances, etc to God because He is always giving beyond what we could ever repay. I think wives are the same way. I know for a fact that I can’t out-give Jenn. My sacrifices pale in comparison to the things she has given up over the years to make our family work. Not to mention the daily sacrifices. Countless. I owe her my best. I will love sacrificially.

The Foolish Farmer (To Get Love, Give Love)

plowed

There was once a Farmer. A foolish man indeed.
He was angry at his crops for staying in their seeds.
He needed food so badly; himself, his wife, and daughter.
The plants refused to grow so he refused them any water.
— James Kennison

I wrote that up to illustrate how the Golden Rule applies to marriage. Firstly, what is the Golden Rule? Do to others what you would have them do to you. Or you could say, treat others how you want to be treated. In the context of marriage you’d say, love your spouse the way you want them to love you.

How many spouses who need to be loved by a husband or wife are like that Farmer? Like the Farmer wants food from a plant he won’t water, they hold back their love and will only give it on the condition that their spouse loves them first. Our goal may be to show a spouse it feels… to give them a taste of their own medicine… but in doing so we’re actually robbing them of the resources they need to even consider giving love in the first place.

If you’ve been holding back hoping to show a souse how it feels… consider changing your tactic and incorporating the Golden Rule into your relationship. Give before it’s given. Treat the other how they should be treating you. Love them how you want to be loved by them. It’ll take time to see the results, just like a seed takes time to grow and produce fruit. Just don’t expect fruit from a seed you won’t water.

Selflessness: The Key To Fulfillment In Marriage

happiness

Most folks will tell you that in a marriage each person has got to give, 50/50. Though it does take two to make it work… true love actually means each person is giving 100% of themselves to the other, independent of what they may or may not receive in return. It is only through selflessness that both are truly fulfilled.

So many marriages today fail because we expect our spouse to fill a void in our lives… to make us happy… and we then hate them when they don’t or can’t. The marriage was doomed for failure from very the beginning because we weren’t going into it to give our love… but to receive it.

There’s a timeless principal in the universe: It is more blessed to give than to receive. It is one of the last undisputed truths in the world. It holds true both on Christmas morning and in our marriages. Fulfillment doesn’t come from getting what you need… but in giving what you are to someone else. Because in giving ourselves completely, we by default open ourselves up, showing who we are and where are true needs are. And because we are giving selflessly, it sparks the same response in them (eventually) and our needs are met by default.

We’re really just talking about unconditional love here. One of the most impossible things for a human to give in life… but one of the only things that will keep a marriage thriving. We’re afraid to give it because all to often it is abused before it is appreciated. It’s abused because it must be tested. And tested before it can be trusted. Hang in there. Give love to your spouse unconditionally and it will do it’s work. True love never fails.

But what about my needs? Give and it will be given to you. Do for others and it will be done for you. Meet their needs and your needs will be met. Any other way leads to complete misery.

This Week’s Popular Posts

popular

10 Ways To Do Father’s Day Right

Father’s Day is coming up. It’s got to be one of the most downplayed events of the year. The role of the father has been devalued in our culture to the point that virtually no one feels it’s an occasion worth celebrating at all…

25 Random Things I Love About My Wife
Let’s start a new meme… one that will actually do some good. I loved “25 Random Things About Me” as much as the next guy… but what could be better than bragging on our spouses?

Parenting Is Setting The Example, And Scary
A wise man once said, “At first a kid will do what you say… but then they’ll do what you do.” A scary thought huh. It means that properly raising your child is more than modifying bad habits and behaviors in your child… it’s also becoming the person you want you child to become yourself.

Show 48 – How To Fight With Your Spouse
A conversation about fighting and arguing. Helpful tips to keep both of you from killing each other.

Show 49 – About Debt
Let’s talk about debt baby. Let’s talk about you and me. Let’s talk about all the good things and the bad things debt can be. Let’s talk about debt. Let’s talk about debt.